Embarrassing confessions?? Lets hear them

MOAR STORIES PLEASE

LOL

i've got a similar story to that but no where near as good to share. :angel:

dropped a gauge in my mates sister last night.... shes a good few years younger than me aswel.. but fuck me, she was tighter than a ducks arse. not the best, but im embarrased about it

gpppppppppppppp

WTF WRONG POST!!!

Only read refuses's post, enjoyed the read :) top notch :D

When is someone gonna admit to being an Arsenal fan?




ho ho ho

i used to watch my mate at motorcross on sundays ... it was a rather wet, cold sunday and the track was waterlogged, there were tractors and people digging to drain the water off of the worst parts.

anyway, i went off with my mates for a walk round the track so we could choose his lines and stuff, the rest of them all had wellys on and were having fun jumping in puddles and shit. i forgot mine so i decided to run back to the van to put mine on, on the way back i was running through puddles (alone) and seen a huge one coming up so i ran and took a massive leap into it ... it turned out to be the hole which the tractors had been digging to drain the excess water. it was about 7ft deep and because it was freezing i had like 4 top layers on and 2 bottom layers on plus wellies ... i couldn't fucking swim because i felt so heavy and just sank .. i managed to kick my wellies off and get to the top, swallowing about 4 pints of muddy shit in the meantime. some guys pulled me out to a crowd of about 30/40 people all pissing themselves ... but i made the newspaper, mint

TL;DR 1:40

haha, nice one lep!

rofl lep, awesome

Went to Reading over the weekend, have a few stories to share but i'll start with this one.

The toilets at Reading as some of you might know are bloody awful - imagine a cargo container with the sides welded up and the top cut off, then some cubicals placed on top with an open hole and a toilet seat, then you pretty much have a Reading Festival bog.

The toilets are cleaned early every morning so if you head down about 7am for your morning poo the contents of the cargo container no longer remain, you're greeted with nice bue toilet duck smelling water. However, if you get to the toilets around 3pm you're in for a shocker. Poo pretty much everywhere and don't even think about looking down the hole, let's just say it doesn't take long to 'pile up'.

So yeah, it's 3pm and I'm fairly pissed walking towards the main arena to see a couple of bands play and I'm dying for a piss, as we're pretty near the main arena I thought it would be best to not piss against the fence and instead use the toilets. So yeah, just having a piss looking forward (don't look down the hole tubbeh) and I hear a loud slashing noise, so yeah I look down. Only to see the person in the cublical opposite me pretty much going through the eye of the needle, either that or they work in the Porn Industry... sick just explodes from my stomach going all over the back of the cubical, seat, floor and also manage to piss on myself. Suddenly, rumble, rumble 'Hello Beer shits' I quickly hover of the bog to get rid of this demon, still puking in the process pretty much all over my pulled down jeans and boxers. No toilet roll so use my sock to wipe.

I'll never forget my friends faces when I come out, covered in sick, grey as a sheet and missing sock. "Ummm Tubb what happened?"...

was grappling with some girl in mma, shes 5'6 7 stone, nice figure, turns out my little man got a bit excited and AS I was wear rugby lineout shorts ROFL without any insides. I had to do my dear best to prevent him taking mario mushrooms and enlarging himself. Kept him at bay but in the process got arm barred by a girl LOL, It was a difficult situation to say the least... LOL espically explaining why I got arm barred to the blokes :DD

Last night I had 4 wet dreams, had to change my boxers 3 times during the night. fml

lmao someones hit a dry spot!

immense thread, so many laughs!

hahaha touché!

don't think there's ever been a wet spot! :(